Simple gratitude practice
I’m not one to feed you the idea that “gratitude changes everything” and “it’s always better to be positive.” I don’t believe that. Like, at all. I think bad stuff happens and things are unfair and life is hard. Sometimes, I even think people suck. (Gasp!) BUT. Weaving gratitude into your day actually can help shift your perspective and find moments that suck less. And sometimes when life is life-ing, small collections of tolerable moments leave an important impact and help you get through the day.
“Hayley, what the hell friend? I’m just going to randomly remember to voice gratitude throughout my day? Seems like I’m going to fail and be frustrated with myself. Thanks a lot.”
Easy, Tiger.
If you’re a person who genuinely loves to take some time to journal with a mug of hot chocolate and really get into all the things that inspire gratitude, I love that for you. You should prioritize that and soak it in. I support you. If you have a habit of telling your partner five things you’re grateful for every night before bed and that’s working well for you guys, I love that for you, too. Keep doing the things that highlight peace and fulfillment. Seriously. That’s amazing.
Some of us want to start wayyyyy smaller. Here are some super simple, take-em-or-leave-em ideas to consider.
Set a reminder
It’s hard to suddenly consider opportunities to think about gratitude. Set a reminder on your phone to prompt you with something like, “What’s something I’m grateful for in this moment?” and see what kind of things stand out to you.
Take a picture
If you see something beautiful or funny or interesting, snap a photo. You might build an album full of things that inspire you and, more than likely, lead you to more feelings of gratitude.
Say, “Thank you”
If you’re not used to saying the words out loud, give it a try! Those little niceties go a long way in making our daily interactions more enjoyable. Take it a step further by naming what you’re thankful for. Your kid’s sloppy kisses, someone holding the door for you, whatever. Tiny interactions like these can become more meaningful when we take the time to express thanks.
Give eye contact
Maybe you’re already in a solid habit of saying, “Thank you.” If that’s the case, you might try adding eye contact. It won’t be practical every time, sure. But a small effort to make eye contact when you express thanks might help you connect a little more meaningfully.
Acknowledge growth
We’re not looking for “positive vibes only” with this. We’re just wanting to intentionally notice and appreciate our growth. It’s comforting to acknowledge things like less pain, quicker recovery, fewer challenges. Don’t withhold gratitude until a grand, final achievement. Make an effort to celebrate small progress along the way.
Expressions of thanks aren’t going to suddenly make all the hard, heavy things better. We know this. Let’s do strive for balance, though—making an effort to connect to our emotions really does help us overall. Accessing feelings of appreciation, hope, connection, and purpose? That’s the good stuff. Your nervous system gathers up those pieces to find a way back to calm. You can build habits of steadiness and grounding. You can feel more like yourself. So start small. Start gentle. Start imperfectly. Just start.
